Stoner Essentials #4 – Avoid Getting Caught Smoking Weed

By |July 18th, 2015

It’s been nearly half a decade since James wrote about Smoking Weed at Home and College without getting caught or smelling up your entire house or dorm.

So why he never thought to review professional-grade products that come in handy for covering the smell of weed is more a testament to his stoner credentials than his blogging ones. It’s all good though, I got his back.

Stoner Essentials #3 – Best Scales for Weighing Weed

By |July 1st, 2015

A nice digital pocket scale is a must-have for any weed smoker. Most people think of scales as a product only pot dealers need, but even if you’re not in the business of selling weed, it’s wise to invest in a scale for a number of reasons.

The most obvious of which is the power to discern whether or not your weed dealer is shorting you. But other than that, a digital weed scale just comes in handy in a lot of situations. If you’ve ever gone in on a sack with one or more friends, you probably wished you had a pocket scale to split up the sack with accuracy.

8 TRUTHS that PROVE Listicle Writers are not KITTEN RAPISTS!!1

By |June 20th, 2015

Listicles. They’re the best thing to happen to the internet since the advent of free porn tubes.

This is a listicle dedicated to listicle writers, who work so hard to entertain the ADHD riddled masses of the world.

Stoner Essentials #2 – Best Storage Containers to Keep Your Weed Fresh

By |June 10th, 2015

Best Airtight Weed Storage Containers of 2015

In the last edition, I let my readers in on a little tip when it comes to buying weed paraphernalia: Amazon.com.

The next category we’ll focus on is the best airtight containers for storing weed.

Anyone who smokes weed on a regular basis should invest in an airtight storage container of some sort. No one likes stale, dry-ass weed.

But other than that, they’s plenty of reasons a stoner should have a quality airtight container to store/transport their weed.

Stoner Essentials #1 – Best Weed Grinders of 2015

By |June 3rd, 2015

Best Weed Grinders of 2015

Most people don’t know this, but Amazon.com is a great place to get cheap weed-related paraphanalia. While they aren’t exactly an online headshop (they don’t sell bongs, pipes, or anything obvious like that) they have a lot of great products every weed smoker should have.

In this edition, I will highlight the best weed grinders available on Amazon.

Tripping on Sassafras (a.k.a. MDA)

By |November 30th, 2014

11:07pm (on a Monday):

For some reason I decided to ingest a drug my friend referred to as Sassafras, which is just slang for MDA. I have no idea what to expect. I’ve never done MDA.

I do, however, know that I’m going to be up all night on this shit.

Ever since writing “The DMT Experience”, which I wrote in the month following the experience, I wanted to write about another hallucinogenic drug while tripping on it. Not an original idea, of course; I’m certainly not the first person to try.

But I like to trip balls, and I like to write, so I’m going to do both, because America.

It’s quite likely this post will end with incomprehensible blabber. Fair warning.

Tales from Weekend Jail

By |November 9th, 2014

It starts on a Friday night.

Depression sinks in. Sitting in traffic after a long week at work, painfully aware that my only free time for the next 7 days is squashed. Leaving the office at 5:00pm allows just enough time to navigate the clusterfuck of Virginia Beach rush-hour traffic between me and my destination. Nothing more.

Overwrought, I envision the next 48 hours.

∴ ∴ ∴

I was arrested for a DUI 3 months ago. It happened on an early Sunday morning around 2am. I took an Uber from the bar to a friends house where I left my car. His door was locked so instead of requesting another Uber, I decided to drive 10 minutes down the road to smoke some bud with another friend of mine. I had been lucky too many times before. This time, I hit a checkpoint.

How To Get Away With Stuff #4: Pulling Off the Fake ID

By |October 15th, 2014

Everyone’s been there.

The party is dying, and FAST. The bottle of Grey Goose you stole from your parent’s freezer is finished, the 6 pack your buddy talked his older brother into giving you is depleted, and the people are getting antsy. The girls are about to leave, because this once smooth-sailing get together is on its way to a spectacular crash.

You and your friends are starting to get nervous. After all, you’re the ones who are supposed to be throwing this bash, and if somebody utters that dreaded “Let’s bounce bro, this party is lame” phrase, you’re fucked.

It seems all hope is lost, when suddenly: BAM!

Changing perspectives on Ferguson

By |September 22nd, 2014

Tensions have risen across the country in the wake of the shooting death of Michael Brown in Ferguson, Mo. While we don’t have all the facts as to what prompted Darren Wilson to kill Brown, the event certainly has brought to light the issues people of color in that community have had with the police in the past.

It has also provided us with a debate on the militarization of local police departments, continued the debate on the use of deadly force by police, and allowed us to bring up suggestions of body cameras on individual officers.

Why I Love Read Receipts

By |September 15th, 2014

Read receipts have achieved a certain level of infamy in the smartphone world. It’s understandable that people are wary of such a feature.

Allow me to explain, for the dwindling race of smartphone-lacking heathens reading this out there (on their antiquated laptops, I presume), that a “read receipt” (pronounced “red”, not “reed”) is a notification to the sender of a text, or texter, that the receiver of the text, or textee, has read the texter’s text.

And for the record, “texter” and “textee” are hereby words. Get with the program, Merriam-Webster!

Five ways to make your Bedroom a Sanctuary

By |September 4th, 2014

If humans were houses, the bedroom would be the heart of it all.

We don’t often realize, but a clean room affects our mood. Messes create a subconscious anxiety; a sense of overhanging duty, and of negative chaos.

Your room should be your fortress. Your place of coveted peace. A restful space for your mind to relax. Treat your room like a sanctuary and it will be one.

An Open Letter to the Potheads of the World

By |August 28th, 2014

Dear stoners and druggies alike,

As we know all too well, weed gets kind of a bad rap. Let’s face it: drug use in general gets one hell of a bad rap. It seems everyone knows someone whose life was destroyed by drugs.

See? Instantly when you read that sentence, your mind conjured up an image of the stereotypical drugged-up moron. The bumbling idiot who wears his Bob Marley tank top with pride (yet can’t name more than one or two of his songs), rocking his marijuana leaf socks, recording Snapchats of every bong rip he takes, posting about 4/20 on Facebook. He probably doesn’t have a job. He certainly has no ambition.