I had one of those moments today where I though of something really good to write about.
And then life threw a minor distraction my way, diverging my train of thought for a matter of mere seconds. Next think I knew, I was thrust into that frustrating mental limbo where I could remember having had the idea, whilst possessing absolutely no immediate knowledge of what it actually was.
Defeated, I ventured to the porch for a cigarette. Whereupon I checked my phone for the time, inadvertently revealing a gift past James was thoughtful enough to leave for future James – an unsent text message articulating my super good idea. It read:
Senility as defense mechanism against fear of death
Though it worked to refresh my memory, it also made me realize it wasn’t really that good an idea in the first place.
To elaborate, it was a fleeting idea that crossed my mind. The simple hypothesis was that senility is just another human function, the purpose of which is to maintain happiness and contentment in the face of imminent death. Think about it, have you ever heard an old person say they fear death? I mean like, a really old person.
I hope the answer to that hypothetical question is no, because otherwise that must’ve been a pretty fucking awkward situation with granny. But I digress. My point is, having lived a fulfilled life can’t be the only thing that caused old dying people to not fear death. And that’s why old people become senile, so they can at least live out their final days doing something – anything – other than dwelling on their imminent death.
That was before I realized that science would suggest, as it indeed does, that senility is a symptom, and could in no way be a result of evolution – considering that reaching senility pretty much means you’ve already survived successfully, and ain’t gonna have much chance to spread your seed anymore.
That was before I recognized the irony of the previous thirty minutes of my life – that is, my senile efforts to remember this thought – which, in and of itself, is something worth writing about.
And thus is the twisted nature of my creative process.